BADGER**BADGER BADGER BADGER BADGER mushroom MUSHROOM! Arrrgh! Snaaaake, snaaake, ooohhhh it's a snaaaake
JEDI MASTER WINDU**I love you and I want your purple lightsaber. Marry me, you fake character. A mysterious knight
YOU WEAR THE SAME** sweater everyday, and I love ya nonetheless. Quirky bastard. Ah, but to be a sad-eyed young blonde. Ask me out sometime? Whee! Institutional? Whee! Frida? Whee!
GUY ON THE CORNER OF 5TH AND PINE**I love how you've bedazzled your sign and your hat. (P.S. Catholics aren't communist, but they're still f*ck3d up). -A Big Fan
A match made in heaven?
OBI-WAN**I *heart* you more even more than Krispy Kreme. Love, zee
ZEE**I AM THINKING OF YOU NAKED TONIGHT WHILE I EAT RAW, FROZEN CORNDOGS AND LISTEN TO CHEAP TRICK. XOXO OBI!
MY GIRLPIRATE KIRSTY**Of all the riches in the galaxy, I covet your pirate booty most of all. Love and lightsabers, Master K.
DARCY**We love that you talk us on walks! That you give us treats! That you pick up our poop! WE ROVE YOU! OsoBAD and AmanDUH
ETTA MAE**We love our bed, Your 'cunka' tastes sweet, You give awesome head, Time to eat? After, we fuck, It's mind-blowing too, Where'd'all the luck Come for us two? Peaches
TO ALL YOU LONELIES** Hoping for a valentine that didn't get one: It could be worse. My last valentine is fucking my brother. At least they're both fat now.